Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Sigh and Sigh Again

In sharing my victories, I feel it is necessary to share my failures also. I blew it last night. I can't go into the specifics (birthday week at our house), but I didn't get what I wanted and I acted like a spoiled brat. No, I didn't get down on the floor and throw a fit, but I was doing exactly that on the inside. It's rather depressing, but I have asked for forgiveness from the person who witnessed this and hopefully received it without too much damage being done. I hate it when the flesh dictates my actions. I didn't recognize the signs at the time because I was too busy making it about me and what I wanted.

Now I have to deal with my emotional baggage. On the positive side it won't take as long as it used to. Years past I would have let it get me down for days. That is making it about me. I'm going to make it about Him.

On the other hand, if we admit our sins - make a clean breast of them - he won't let us down; he'll be true to himself. He'll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. 1 John 1:9 (The Message)

1 comment:

Shiela said...

Sarah, this has touched me. In my last 3 months of being left by Robert I at times felt the hurt any one has with that and times I would be so angry at ME for not doing anything right and taking all the blame for it all because that is how his kids dished it out to me and even him once in an letter. Then there are the times when it is POOR little me. Look what Robert has done to ME. Yes it is hard to go through all this and especially the way he left me but I had days when 'feel sorry for me' popped its head up. I was to busy asking God to TALK to me and I need answers and why was I not hearing from Robert or God that I did not see what was right in front of me. GOD'S LOVE. He has been talking to me the last 2 months. Showing me HIS love through the church, Jon and the gang over here fixing my home, Celebrate Recovery and more. I had to tell HIM I was sorry. I got myself wrapped up in losing my husband and still facing the divorce that I was not seeing GOD was there all the time. HE will never leave me. Thank you